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read between the lines
out of the ashes "hold upthis week was kind of a bumpy road for me, no thanks to a stressful start to the week, both at home and at work. the rest of the week was spent getting over the hangover of an emo mood. i went a bit wonky and did some irrational actions, but not on a large scale, mercifully. and i found two unlikely friends as well as some unlikely opportunities to derive sideline support from a few old friends -- hence the stanza quotation above. and i made major headway (i dare say) in working out some personal issues of mine that were the cause of my stress this week. mostly, i'm so glad i was present at the youth service i was at tonight, because the speaker told me just what i needed to hear right now. that everything is going to be okay, no matter what i do. the last time i heard that was seven years ago (via a strong personal inkling), despite the circumstances indicating otherwise. and indeed, it did turn out okay -- in fact, better than okay. i ended up undertaking the most exhilarating course of study ever. ain't God awesome? i spent the last few minutes of 2009 on my knees as a symbol of my intended posture to god for the coming year. the next day, i was on my knees -- literally. food poisoning for a week: and all i had was a burger and a vanilla soufflé. dang that soufflé.good thing i wasn't sick on the eve; did the usual reflections on the past year and all. am happy to say that i really surprised myself last year in terms of personal progress and chalked up a substantial number of firsts -- always a booster for me ('cos who likes a boring mundane life anyway?). the summation of my reflection was this: i got a better job, and that gradually paved the way for a better life, resulting in better circumstances and a subsequently better disposition. and i know for sure i didn't get the job, or its benefits, from my own efforts. i mean sure it wasn't all hunky dory and stars in my eyes and dancing in the streets everyday (clearly i seem to be influenced by too many musicals), but to me, there was a marked difference in where i was at last year compared to the year before. so kudos and amen to God for helping me break through some of my personal barriers. truly, truly, it was my year (of the ox). |
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