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read between the lines
fishy the fighting fish passed away as i was here figuring out the answers for my exam (yes, i actually get them in advance, but it's not as easy as people think). dad found its nose and head sunken into the artificial leaves where it's so used to hiding. 5 months of staying with us and it's gone.was finding it rather hard to come to a closure with the fish's death cos the thing was my brother and i actually saw a sign of it not looking too well just one and a half hours earlier, at 8.30pm or so....we saw it almost bend double and suspend itself in mid-water for awhile before going back into position. and well...i started taking that guilt trip again of me being too blind to actually have sensed something was wrong then. i mean, not that i could've saved the fish, but maybe i could've....been there or something....for moral support. i dunno. at first it was a bit hard to come to terms and just...not feel bad....but thankfully i'm not feeling so unsettled anymore. i guess that's me, always feeling bad if i don't have proper goodbyes. but let's not get into that. i don't wanna open up old wounds. and no, i'm not talking about my grandad's passing. |
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