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read between the lines
the trip so far "The Lord will rescue His people when He sees that their strength is gone. He will have mercy on those who serve Him, when He sees how helpless they are." -- DEUTERONOMY 32: 36 that was tonite's verse of comfort that seeped out to me from the pages of the bible in my pain today. it's...strange...or maybe not, but during the trip i was okay (or at least coping). n then today when it ended, i got affected physically, mentally and emotionally. maybe it's becos i haven't had enough sleep that my nerves are easily triggered, i don't know. but pressing thoughts certainly kept me up instead of snoozing like i originally planned to. so i prayed. i've lost count of the times i've encountered the short spurts of bursting out momentarily happened today. kinda unusual for me. but it's all been put on hold for now....have calmed down a bit after a few hrs, n my physical symptoms of sickness have faded. but i really gotta say that this verse rang true for me not just for tonite but during the trip....He was my strength the whole time and continues to be, for i knew i was forever weak and if i had actually used my own strength i wouldn't have gotten this far. oh wow. i've jus seen my fren's msn nick change from the i'm-thankful-to-god mood to these three words literally: "piece of shit". wow, so i guess i'm not the only one in christ feeling that way too tonite. but i'm not feeling it so much rite now...i think partly cos i'm getting sleepy....too tired to think much of in-depth stuff in this state. but other than today's worse-than-usual weakness, the trip was actually pretty inspiring....i can honestly say that i can see the hand of god moving in this trip..not literally, but i definitely do see the effects of it. for one, He has changed the situation between me and the team for me, and continues to amaze me and "come to my rescue" (see above) every day. which reminds me....thank you so much for all who have been praying for me with regards to this trip...thanks for praying for the team n for my specific prayer needs. i really am grateful that you peeps did and that at least i can say that i see unity in us praying for the same thing. back to the previous paragraph. where was i? oh yeah. and for another, he has been helping us, or rather, me, deal with the kids....cos they were quite a handful initially. i remember....the first day started off on the wrong foot for all of us, though i kinda think that i didn't get it as bad as the rest. it was "bad" because...we got to find out that the kids were actually monsters and hyperactive balls of energy in disguise. but somehow i feel really blessed becos, so far i have not had that serious the problems with the kids who were under me compared to my other teammates. second day was slightly easier....cos the kids got more accustomed and used to us...at least that's what the general comment was among the group. the remainder of the days drew mixed reactions from the team. but through it all, i have seen God working and coming through for me so many times when i needed His help and empowerment. and i've gotten to make some pretty firm friends already....firm as in they are consistent in their coming up to talk to me. am getting tired now and i think the best thing to do right now is rest my tired and weary head...and besides i'm zoning out now and i can't seem to think clearly as the time ticks by. came back today to rest, n gotta go out to singapore tomoro again n continue our final week of the trip. hope it goes well, both between the team, the kids and my walk with god. btw this phrase just came to mind tonite n i've put it on my msn nick....the pain and the providence go hand in hand....i think it does, from what i've experienced....and i guess i was thinking of this also because it was similar to today's team devotion reading...one of the articles was about how being close to god doesn't mean being essentially happy (as in finding some comfortable niche where everything works out smoothly and you love your life), which was what i had to find out the hard way.... |
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