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read between the lines
pain part 2 very introspective. very thoughful. very broken.can probably put that in my friendster profile. wry laugh. i've no more tears to cry now. feeling haggard. i've got a paper to compile and pass over to my friend to complete tomoro and i'm not done yet. what a nite to be wretched. father, forgive me. i feel so sinful for falling short of what you want me to be, failing in the same old things. i don't understand, father, i don't understand....or at least i only know enough for it to hurt...my wisdom is short-sighted. i never thought i'd understand this song (below), but i totally do tonight. this is me, raw and open. i'm not gonna bother to edit it or put on some tatemae because right now i'm just too mentally tired to do that. as of today, i will be halting all postings here for this week. i think i might blog, but it'll be in the other private one, and much more in the tangible journal. yup, going back to my old ways. i'm gonna extricate myself from the outside world just for this week and go into hiding for one week...and hopefully i'll see what god wants me to see and i'll come out of it stronger. so i think coffee houses will be the norm again, among other places of solitude. if you want to, pray for me. Don't Be There by SWITCHFOOT Don't be there 'Cause I'm on my way And I'm already gone over And I'm on my way I can't recall myself How I went down Did I get shot or Shoot myself I'm down here And you're way up there But that doesn't hurt badly But it stings right here And I won't pretend there's nothing there You be around and I'll be square Don't be alarmed if I'm not there You be around and I'll be square If you're a rose Then I'm the thorn That's in your side And does it hurt badly 'Cause it burns right here I can't recall myself How I went down Did I get shot or Shoot myself I'd like to say hello I'd like to say I care I'd like to let you know That nothing here's the Same with me Nothing here's the same I can't recall myself How I went down Did I get shot or Shoot myself Don't be around Don't be there |
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