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read between the lines
exhaustive today started off pretty erm...not so nice lah. n it started off exhaustive too. cos was up the nite before, doing some last-minute sch work which my project mates handed to me last-minute (so it's not like i cud do it earlier cos my part depended on theirs). then today, had the 8am class....argh. which means i got up at that "insanely early" time again. i think that's like my fave cliche now when i mention 8am classes...hah. heck, i'm so tired now i can't even laugh fully.yeah, so i got up early, but not early enuff, n there was the usual causeway jam, n it was raining so it's not like i cud get out n walk across in the rain. but praise the lord i somehow managed to wake up "early" this time, tho not at the appointed time, but early enuff to take in the time taken for the jam to clear. so i reached sch late, but at least marked "present" cos i was within the half-hour grace timing. but not before this horrible indian erm, female dog at customs called me "stupid" for ovetaking her. i mean, heck, i'm rushing for class, you're slowing me down by walking so fricking slow with your fat short podgy legs, n so i overtake you n you call me "stupid"? who's the "stupid" one here? n she was in nurse's uniform summore....eesh. i sure wudn't want her for a nurse. n it's not like she was a student or anything, she was like in her 40s n she had the balls to be mean? but whatever. i'm trying not to get angry. actually i was about to say something back to her after she called me that, but i stopped n moved on becos...christ reminded me. not a tooth for a tooth, jess, He says. tough act to follow...but i'm glad now i'm not feeling like super angry still from that. gotta learn to forgive..somehow. or else if i go like this over every little offense done to me i mite as well die of heart disease or some sickness associated with brewing ur anger inside. yeah, then class was the usual, n it ended early today....but sadly, i cudn't go home n sleep even tho i was already suffering from sleep deprivation, seriously. i was having like a headache, n a woozy sort of feeling, n to make matters worse someone kept wanting to talk to me when i was trying to sleep so i was getting pretty irritated, so in the end i left n K.O. -ed in the library. completely knocked out, for like, 3 hrs. i went somewhere quiet where i knew very few ppl knew off...hehehe. when i woke up i felt so much better....n the headache was gone. why cudn't i go home early? well yesterday someone called in n said they needed a pianist for life (as in life meeting). n of all days to practice for worship they had to pick today. n they said they cudn't get the band together any other day. so no choice lor. but thank god i got my 3 hrs of sleep.....think this is a record for me, cos the most i ever slept in sch was 2 hrs before this. then after that i had my usual chat with the Man Upstairs...n then rushed home. yeah, He's still helping me go thru some things in life.....some hurdles which i haven't completely crossed yet. like the pain of watching yourself do the opposite of what you'd rather do, because the Spirit is telling you to do otherwise. but i'm still trying to accept the life lesson of glorifying god as opposed to gratifying self. yawn. better slp now or i'l suffer tmr. n yeah, i was listening to dc talk on the bus home n switchfoot after my bath. |
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